Ebb and Flow: On Mental Health and Coping With Ambiguity

Ebb and Flow: On Mental Health and Coping With Ambiguity

by | | Advice, After College, Blog, During College, Guest Post, Spiritual Life

I’ll begin by spilling my heart.  I have the deepest respect for you all who are OCF students and I would do all I could for you.

So, what is mental health and what is ambiguity?  Basically, mental health is an ability to cope with stress, connect with others, and have a positive outlook on life. As Orthodox Christians we would say “having peace and joy in Christ.”

Mental health is, of course, variable and it ebbs & flows with different circumstances.  

Ambiguity is simply an awareness of “I know that I don’t know.”  For college students, ambiguity can be a regular state of mind.  For instance, “I don’t know where I will be in five years,” or “I don’t know how many of my friends will remain friends once we graduate,” or “What does life (Christ) want me to do as my vocation.”

Mmmmm.  With each class and each relationship our mind can take on new colors, not unlike the veritable kaleidoscope.  For lack of better language, I’ll call that “normal” for a college student.  The question is, “So what,” or “What can I do about it.”

I would say that, fundamentally, we try to absorb and accept an attitude of surrender to Jesus Christ.  Doesn’t that sound impossible?  Not really.  An attitude of surrender is a gift from Christ that grows slowly, up and down as we age.  The strategy is this:

  • A. I don’t know.
  • B. Christ knows.
  • C. I try to trust Him.

We certainly don’t know the future.  We never say to someone, “Things will get better.”  The person we are talking with might die later that day.  We are not God.  We can’t predict the future and we don’t have access to the details of exactly what is coming.  That is a great gift from God, to help us cope in the present moment with less concern.

But, there is a ‘control freak’ in each of us.  We are tempted to over-control our circumstances and the circumstances of others.  Our control-freak tendencies can lessen as we learn to trust in the guidance of Christ.  I would add that control-freak tendencies come from fear and our fears can lessen as we learn to live more with Christ.  It is much easier to detect control-freak tendencies in others than in ourselves.  Lord, have mercy.  And, He does.

Truthfully, we don’t even have full access to the details of the present moment.  We are limited in our ability to be aware of our pre-conscious and surely, our unconscious.  That’s what human existence is like for all of us.  All humans are children of Eve and Adam.  And, we don’t have much knowledge of the motivations and deliberations of others, even those close to us.  I know an old couple, married happily for 65 years, who walk hand in hand. The wife said, “I know my husband like the back of my hand but I will never fully understand him.” That is real life with mega ambiguity. We don’t know much about the full back-story of anyone so we try to cut them slack in our minds.  My own personal attitude is to try to say, “Everyone is doing the best they can with what they have… even Biden and Trump.”  Of course, I have no idea if they are for not, but I am more stabilized and joy-filled if I can maintain such an outlook.

I’ll conclude by saying that I have much ambiguity in my life and so do you.  We walk together and we do the best we can with what we have.  Father Hopko often said, “Stay close to Jesus.”  Together, let’s try to do just that.

Dr. Albert Rossi

Dr. Albert Rossi

Licensed Clinical Psychologist

Dr. Albert Rossi is a licensed clinical psychologist and Christian educator who has written numerous articles on psychology and religion. He has published two books through Ancient Faith Publications entitled, Becoming a Healing Presence and All is Well. Dr. Rossi was a member of the SCOBA Commission on Contemporary Social and Moral Issues for six years. He hosts the podcast Becoming a Healing Presence on Ancient Faith Radio.

Managing Anxiety: How to Find Peace

Managing Anxiety: How to Find Peace

by | | Blog

Discussing the current state of the world within our social circles often fills us with fear, doubt, and anxiety over what lies ahead. Beginning a new school year and being forced to navigate even more uncertainty can be overwhelming – perhaps even paralyzing. It is so easy to become weighed down with anxiety over the future because we will always fear what we don’t know. Fear is our natural reaction to unknowns, and it is to be expected. A certain degree of fear is needed to push us to succeed, but an overabundance will prevent us from maintaining a spirit of peace by causing us to emotionally disconnect from others in an attempt to preserve our sense of control. Building a wall of emotional detachment is a temporary fix to satisfy our need to be in control of our own life, but it is not a sustainable solution for preserving our spiritual and emotional health in the long run.

Peering out from behind our wall, we hope to have the outward appearance of being in control and unafraid of what lies ahead of us, but we must accept that we cannot always be in control of everything. Strength is not in the height or depth of our wall; strength is being able to face what is out of our control with grace by trusting in God’s love and mercy for us. There are plenty of things we wish did not happen in our lifetime and even more we wish we could change, but we cannot allow our fear to dominate our life and dictate our actions as we continue to move forward. We risk a disconnection from love if we live for ourselves within an enclosed, safety wall. To love Christ and our neighbor is to know peace; cultivating a spirit of peace is a sustainable means of controlling one’s anxiety. It follows then that we must first find Christ if we are to find love; finding Christ shouldn’t be too difficult if one pays attention to their surroundings because He is “everywhere present and filing all things.” He is present in the company of loved ones, the glance of a stranger, the laughter of a child, and the warm embrace of a friend. He is with us in the liturgy and church services. He is there in the ache of a broken heart, the salt of tears, and the hours leading up to homework deadlines. He is in the fall of rain, the bright light of the sun, the touch of grass, and the scent of flowers. He is there in silence and the rhythm of song. We must allow this realization of His eternal presence to fill us with such overwhelming love that all else becomes insignificant.

“When you find Christ, you are satisfied, you desire nothing else, you find peace. You become a different person. You live everywhere, wherever Christ is. You live in the stars, in infinity, in heaven with the angels, with the saints, on earth with people, with plants, with animals, with everyone and everything. When there is love for Christ, loneliness disappears. You are peaceable, joyous, full. Neither melancholy, nor illness, nor pressure, nor anxiety, nor depression nor hell.” – St. Porphyrios.

It is a challenge to love, but the fulfillment is unmatched. If we open ourselves up to it, the love of Christ will surpass our earthly cares and allow us to experience peace in a world where we are continually surrounded by turmoil. While we might feel a mixture of emotions as we start this new school year, let us not forget God has the power to transcend all our present circumstances. Through His love we will find the strength necessary to meet each coming day with peace. One can always expect to struggle, to endure pain, and to doubt; but we must always remember that we will always have His love. We will find both wholeness and healing by opening the floodgates of our heart to Christ’s all-consuming love; once we do that, we will find that there can be no room for anything else. Radiate love, and peace will come about naturally.

“Grace, mercy, and peace will be with us, from God the Father and from Jesus Christ the Father’s Son, in truth and love.” (2 John 1:3)

Magdalena Hudson

Magdalena Hudson

Publications Student Leader

Magdalena is a nursing student at Lakeshore Technical College. In her free time she loves to read, draw, listen to music, be outdoors, and spend quality time with loved ones. She enjoys all the comforts of home, as well as a good adventure now and then. If you would like to contribute to the blog, please reach out to Magdalena at publicationsstudent@ocf.net! 

Lord, It Is Good for Us To Be Here

Lord, It Is Good for Us To Be Here

by | | Blog

“And after six days Jesus took with him Peter and James and John his brother and led them up a high mountain apart. And He was transfigured before them, and His face shone like the sun, and His garments became white as light.” (Matt. 17 1-2).

Take a moment and try to imagine what the Transfiguration of Christ might have been like through the eyes of the apostles. Picture yourself standing in the shadow of Mount Tabor, knowing what a long haul it will be to the top. Now try to imagine all the little things that might make the journey uncomfortable along the way: hours spent in the heat of the day, blistered feet, aches, hunger, thirst, and all the brambles. How many times have we felt that we were also standing at the foot of a mountain (whether it be a personal goal/desire, a spiritual journey, or emotional suffering) knowing what a difficult journey it will be to ascend it? Often we might find ourselves standing there frozen and wondering where on earth we will find the strength to journey to the top. When that wonder hits us, we can find ourselves believing we can do it completely alone through sheer will-power, or we can stop to ask God for the grace necessary to meet the task ahead.

It had to have been a long and grueling trip to the top of Mount Tabor, but sooner or later Jesus and the apostles reached the pinnacle. On the top of Mount Tabor the apostles beheld the Transfigured Christ. Peter declared, “Lord it is good for us to be here…” Despite the long and difficult journey, the apostles were in such awe and admiration of Christ’s Transfiguration that they wished to remain there upon the mountain forever rather than make the journey back down. However, remaining on the mount was not to take place. What did take place was yet another transformation – a transformation within their own hearts. After leaving Mount Tabor, they would carry the joy of that encounter as they made their return journey back into the world. That joy allowed them to find Christ within their hearts and gave them strength to push on. St. Anastasius Sinaita has this to say in his sermon on the Transfiguration:

“It is indeed good to be here, as you have said, Peter. It is good to be with Jesus and to remain here forever. What greater happiness or higher honor could we have than to be with God, to be made like him and to live in his light? Therefore, since each of us possesses God in his heart and is being transformed into his divine image, we also should cry out with joy: It is good for us to be here – here where all things shine with divine radiance, where there is joy and gladness and exultation; where there is nothing in our hearts but peace, serenity, and stillness; where God is seen. For here, in our hearts, Christ takes up his abode together with the Father, saying as he enters: “Today salvation has come to this house.” With Christ, our hearts receive all the wealth of his eternal blessings, and there where they are stored up for us in him, we see reflected as in a mirror both the first fruits and the whole of the world to come.”

Like the apostles, we too are called to struggle up our own mountains. While the mountains in each of our lives might vary, we each have a shared purpose in our journey – finding Christ within our heart. Once we find Christ in our heart through the struggles we have undertaken, we must hold Him there within ourselves and allow Him to transform our lives as we continue to spread the gospel and grow closer to Him in faith. We will find purpose in our life by choosing to see our trials as an opportunity to grow closer Him on our path towards theosis. The feast of the Transfiguration has much to teach us. No matter the reasons we have to lose heart in the face of adversity, we will find even more cause to press on with faith in Jesus Christ.

Magdalena Hudson

Magdalena Hudson

Publications Student Leader

Magdalena is a nursing student at Lakeshore Technical College. In her free time she loves to read, draw, listen to music, be outdoors, and spend quality time with loved ones. She enjoys all the comforts of home, as well as a good adventure now and then. If you would like to contribute to the blog, please reach out to Magdalena at publicationsstudent@ocf.net!